Mom's not all ya got

2009-04-22T15:38:00.000-07:00

So, I haven't posted anything on this in months and months but here I am trying this again.

I have two little boys TJ is almost 3 and Eli is 18 months. They are such amazing little men. Every day the surprise me.

I am a stay-at-home mom since I had Eli.

I used to be a CNA.

I love staying home with my boys, but it has taken it's toll on my body. Not being out working walking all the time. I never lost the weight I gained when I was pregnant with Eli. I even gained more weight after I had him.

I recently started weight watchers (which I had tried before with good results) and have lost 17 pounds in 4 weeks!

I go on walks and have even been trying to run. I don't run far or for very long mostly just walking but I'm trying.

That is all.

2008-12-17T12:22:00.000-08:00

2008-09-27T18:32:00.001-07:00

A few months back there was a story in the paper about a Winchester man who was accused of abusing his 4 month old daughter. Well, I saw today where he got a plea deal and only got an 18 month sentence, he only has to serve six months, and three years probation.

I am disgusted! The Randolph County Prosecutor is a joke.

That is the same sentence that the asshole that killed my brother got. Jerry was out in three months plus he was on work release the whole time.

Murderers and child abusers are getting off with a slap on the wrist. It's no wonder that people take the law into their own hands.

I'm not saying that should happen, but I can understand it.

I just needed to get that off my chest. It's so upsetting to see horrible people getting nothing for their crimes and innocent people have to suffer.

My brother is dead and his killer is free to live his life like nothing happened. That poor defenceless baby was seriously injured and her abuser is going to be free in a few months to abuser her again. It makes me sick!

2008-09-22T06:49:00.000-07:00

So, I know I haven't posted anything in a while I haven't been a very dedicated blogger. Shame on me.
My two little boys are getting so big so fast. TJ is 2 now and into everything. Eli is going to be one in less than a month. They definitely keep me busy.
These are not my boys, but the picture is absolutely something I could see them doing.

see more pwn and owned pictures

Iaboga????

2008-08-20T22:06:00.000-07:00

I know I haven't blogged in forever. I don't even know why. I suddenly had the urge to blog earlier and got very distracted by a video on youtube (link below). Very funny, check it out! The narrator is a friend of Virginia's.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ArKrHoUIW3A

Ghostbusters

2008-05-29T12:53:00.000-07:00

I have a very close friend that is probably the most rational and logical person that I know. She stayed at the house the other night and is now convinced that my home is haunted. It was about five in the morning and I heard my youngest son Elijah crying. When I went upstairs I found all the lights on and my friend was holding Eli. She said that she heard and old timey song and then felt hands on her back and someone say "Shhhh, it's gonna be okay." Creepy.

It did get me thinking. Shortly after we moved in before the boys were sleeping upstairs. I was getting the tub ready to give TJ a bath, our upstairs bath is the only one with a tub. I had TJ upstairs with me he was running from room to room. He went into the guest bedroom (the one that Lori was in when she had her "experience") he was only in there for a minute and he came running out of the room screaming and crying. I chalked it up to him being a baby, that's what they do scream and cry.

I never used to believe in ghost or spirits or whatever you wanna call them. That is until my brother passed away unexpectedly. Since his accident I'm convinced he has tried to contact me on more than one occasion. We have a three-way touch light that had always worked just fine and never did anything out of the ordinary. After my brother passed it started turning on in the middle of the night. It would come one and get brighter and brighter and then go back off. It would do this over and over. I like to think it was him just letting me know he's still around.

So my completely rational and sane friend is convinced that the house is haunted. She told me I need to do some research on the property to find out if anyone has died in the house. I don't exactly know how to go about doing that. I can't find anything on the internet so it looks like I'm headed to the museum here in town. We'll see what I find out.

2008-05-08T23:18:00.000-07:00

I got a new tattoo today. It's a butterfly on my wrist. It's pretty awesome. Oh yeah. So I'm not exactly a tattoo virgin this makes my fifth. Not all of them mean as much as others but this one means a lot. I'm going through a very rough time personally. Butterflies symbolize life and death, rebirth. My butterfly is giving me my rebirth. I am starting over with some aspects of my life and am going to be making some big changes. My butterfly is a turning point in my life. I'm at a point where I have to be making some big decisions and hopefully my new ink will be of some inspiration. That is why I chose to put it on my wrist so I will see it everyday and be reminded of my rebirth.

All of my other tattoos are n places that no one can see or that are easily hideable. This one I want to display. I want everyone to know that I am changing. Changing for the better.

Scar you for life.

2008-05-07T12:45:00.000-07:00

I felt I should elaborate on one of my list items. Number seven, "Even little things from your childhood can scar you for life." I had a babysitter when I was very young like before I was even in school. I don't remember her name or even what she looked like. She made me eat fish sticks all the time. "If you don't eat them you can't have anything." Thats what she would tell me. I know it doesn't seem like a big deal, but when your like four or five years old and some mean old lady is forcing you to eat food that you can't stand. It's traumatising. To this day I have a true phobia of eating fish. I get sick to my stomach if it's even on the same table as mine. Wierd.

List

2008-05-06T15:12:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking about list. I like list. I could make a list of all the reasons list are helpful, but I won't. I've been having a lot of random thoughts lately so I thought I would make a list up to get them all out of my system. Here goes...

1. Making list is fun!

2. Nothing feels better on bare feet than new carpet. (We just got it installed)

3. Planting flowers can be very therapeutic.

4. Nothing in this whole world compares to waking up and seeing a smile on your child's face and knowing that it's because he is looking at you!

5. Mixing cement is fun! It made me a little nostalgic, like making mud pies.

6. If you don't change the edging tape after every coat of paint it will peel.

7. Even little things from your childhood can scar you for life.

8. I am stronger than I thought, physically and emotionally.

9. Even sticky baby kisses are great kisses!

10. Sharing a drink with a toddler is a great way to find out what he's been eating.

11. I will have more random thoughts later.

2008-04-22T19:24:00.000-07:00

Today was a really good day! Me and the boys went to my moms to see her. My boys love going to see "nana" especially my oldest TJ. As soon as we get on her road he starts "nananananana" until we get in the house. Today my grandma was there too and TJ just loves Grrrr, that's what he calls her.

TJ wanted to go outside so Grrrr took him out and then mom decided that Eli wanted to go out too so we all ended up spending most of the day outside. I got some sun, which is good, but I am so pasty white that I am a little burnt. But we had so much fun that it's totally worth it.

I also got my hair colored today. I couldn't decide if I wanted to go red or blonde so I opted for what was supposed to be red blonde. Well, it is very much not a red blonde. It is very much red red! It wasn't what I originally wanted but I don't think it looks too bad.

Wow, I just realized that today wasn't all that great of a day, I got a sun burn and my hair color got messed up. Lets try to look on the bright side, at least I didn't get burnt enough that my skin and my hair match!

Me time

2008-04-20T12:57:00.000-07:00

Let me start by saying that I have two beautiful baby boys that mean the world to me they are my life. I have a wonderful husband who does so much for me. He works full-time so that I can stay home with the boys. He also goes to school full-time to make a better life for us and our sons.

I have been doing a lot of thinking about myself and the people in my life and I'm really starting to feel under appreciated. I worry so much about everybody else, and I'm starting to see that not many people in my life worry about me.

So I'm gonna worry about me for a while. I've decided to take a little time everyday and just worry about me. Something every mom should do. Being a mom is such a thankless job anyway, then having people around who don't appreciate the things you do.

I've spent so much of the past few years worrying about how everybody else is, and just taking things that people have thrown at me without realizing what it has done to me.

I got really sick a few months ago, and have had to have two spinal taps. And it had a lot to do with the fact that I haven't been taking care of myself. I've been spending too much time worrying about everybody else, and I don't have anybody that worries about me.

It recently hit me the other day, the disorder that I have (the reason I've had to have two spinal taps) could get so bad that I could have serious problems, I could lose my eyesight, it can make my limbs and my face lose function, I may have to have like brain surgery. If I don't start taking better care of myself I may not be able to be there for my children.

So, I'm turning over a new leaf. I'm going to start worrying more about myself and taking better care of myself. I have to nobody is going to do it for me. I am making a commitment to myself to be better to me and not worry so much about everybody else, with the exception of my children of course. I'm doing this not only for myself but for them so that I can be here for them, completely.

In a way, I feel like I've given so much of myself to everyone else that I feel like I should have given more of that to my children. I feel like my time and energy and concern have been wasted on certain people.

I realize that other people have issues too, and I listen to them and I try to help but I don't get that in return form anybody and that is what I need right now. It hurts me to feel this way but it's how I feel, and something needs to change.

A Couple of thoughts

2008-04-18T16:11:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking about being a stay-at-home mom. I love it, I love being with my boys. I have a friend who is expecting anytime now, a little boy. I'm very excited for her so I thought I would make a list of a few things that may be helpful.

1. Always keep the peetail covered. They know as soon as the diaper comes off and they can aim.
2. Always take more than you think you need, of everything, because if you don't you'll need it.
3. Buy a co-sleeper so the baby can be next to you at night it saves you from running into the next room for a dropped pacifier.
4. A baby swing is a life-saver at 3 a.m. when your little one won't stop screaming. Of course if you don't have one in the bedroom you may end up sleeping on the couch!
5. When the baby takes a nap, you take a nap or at least rest. Trust me you'll need it!
6. Always put things up one shelf higher than you think the baby can reach. Cause he can reach it.
7. Learn to function on very little sleep.
8. Just because it doesn't look like you, doesn't mean it's not yours.
9. Take advantage of a babysitter every once in a while, one you know well, it gives you a chance to be with other adults.
10.No matter how much wonderful advice you get, nothing is as good as trusting your instincts. Do what you think is best.

Two hour car rides with children.

2008-04-09T21:23:00.000-07:00

Today we took a trip to Lebanon, Ohio to see my dad. I love going to see him because we don't see him much. The only thing is, it's about a two hour car ride. Did I mention I have two children under the age of 2?

Elijah is only six months old so he's still little enough that he will pretty much fall asleep as soon as we get going and stay asleep most of the way there. That makes it pretty nice we don't have to stop a hundred times, he's not screaming his head off the whole way. TJ used to be like that.

TJ is now 20 months old, almost 2 years old. He does not fall asleep as easily in the car. He hates his car seat, he likes to kick the back of the drivers seat repeatedly, he screams and tries to wake up Eli (at least I'm pretty sure that is what he's going for). Because when he gets Eli going too then we have a chorus line of screaming babies in the back seat. I'm convinced they love to tag-team us.

Our trip started out okay. We got everything ready: diapers, check, wipes, check, bottle of formula for Eli, sippy with milk for TJ, double check. We got food for the boys when we get there, snacks for on the way, a change of clothes, and the thing that came in the most handy... the portable DVD player.

We got about twenty minuets away from home when we had to stop for TJ's first change of clothes. Hint: Always take more than one change of clothes for your toddler, ALWAYS. He decided to do his little, take a drink of milk and let it run down his chin, thing.

I neglected to mention that the way we would normally go to Lebanon way closed so we had to take a different route. I don't know if anybody is familiar with highway 227 but it is not a good road to take with a toddler in the car.

We were already on 227 when TJ needed his milk covered clothes changed. Not many places to stop on that road. So when we spotted a tiny church, we stopped and I proceeded to changed TJ's clothes in the back of the HHR on the side of the road.

Did I mention 227 is not good with children in the car? We got going after the milk incident and realized that 227 has got to be the hilliest (yeah I make up words okay) road ever. I'm not just talking about some bumps in the road. I mean the big hills, the kind that make you feel like your ass is in your stomach and your stomach is in your throat. TJ doesn't like those hills!

TJ started freaking out about 10 minuets after the "incident", thank heaven for portable DVD players! I can't stand The Wiggles, but they were my best friends today! We put their DVD in and TJ was mesmerized. He was silent almost the whole way there. It was amazing!

After we got to my dads TJ and Eli were both rip-roaring ready-to-go! They had a ball, dad loves to hold Eli because he's still small enough. TJ won't let anybody hold him he gets down and plays. He had so much pent-up energy from the car ride that dad's apartment looked like it had been hit by a tornado!

Me and Josh left for a few minuets to get something to eat by the time we got back with it TJ had spilled his juice all down the front of himself. This is why I say always bring more than one change of clothes for a toddler. TJ had to wear one of my dads old t-shirts home, it is seriously bigger than he is!

On a side note, Eli did wonderful today! This was his longest car ride so far, and he slept the whole way there and the whole way back. He spent most of the day at dads chewing on papaws shoulder. It's nice that he's still young enough that I only needed one change of clothes for him. That was only because someone decided to take his bib off and he drooled all down the front of himself. He doesn't intentionally try to see how much liquid his clothing will hold.

Family movie night

2008-04-07T08:34:00.000-07:00

Josh got home form work early yesterday and both the boys were taking a nap. It was nice to have some grown up time. Although, sometimes I do find myself talking baby talk even when I'm having a grown up conversation. Josh sat in the kitchen doing his homework and talking to me while I fixed supper.

After the boys woke up, while supper was still in the oven, Josh decided that him and TJ needed to go to the video store. They came back with Alvin and The Chipmunks. So we decided to have a family movie night.

After supper, which we all sat down and ate at the dinner table (That doesn't happen very often with Josh working full-time and going to school full-time) we gave the boys a bath.

We all piled on the couch with our popcorn and started the movie. TJ is still at the stage where nothing holds his attention for very long. But he sat on the couch with me and Josh and watched about the first half of the movie with out moving. Of course we did have the popcorn so that could have been why.

I would definitely recommend Alvin and the Chipmunks to anybody. It was so cute. I would also recommend a family movie night for anybody. We had such a fun time. We don't get to spend too much time as a family just hanging out there is always something going on.

I think that family movie night may become a weekly thing at our house!

Rachel Ray is my new BFF!

2008-04-05T11:35:00.000-07:00

I've been trying to do a lot more actual cooking. I mean more than warming up a can a ravioli or making mac and cheese. I'm trying to get my family to eat better.

I have always loved to cook. When I lived at home with my parents and brother I would fix supper and have it ready when mom got home from work.

After having the boys I kinda started taking the easy way out, ordering out or fixing something out of a box or can. Well, I figured since we were moving to a new house I should start over with the cooking situation.

The kitchen in the new house is in the perfect location. It's right in the center of the house so whether the boys are in the front room or in the family room I can still keep an eye on them.

So I've been cooking like crazy lately, and I'm having so much fun trying new things.
Josh bought me a Rachel Ray cookbook a while ago and I hadn't used it. I tried a few recipes out of it and I am hooked.

I tried buffalo turkey burgers the other day, left the "buffalo" off for TJ. Meaning I didn't put hot sauce on his. Put a little ranch dressing on it and you got a good time!

Today I made minute steaks and potato ragout. Minute steaks, pretty self-explanatory. Potato ragout, so good. It's potatoes cooked in a skillet with onions, garlic, rosemary, thyme, and parsley. Then you simmer it it chicken stock and white wine but I don't use the wine I just use extra stock. It was amazing!

I forgot how relaxing it is just to go into the kitchen and cook. Eli almost always takes a nap right around the time I fix supper. TJ just kinda does his own thing, he keeps himself entertained. I can go in the kitchen and fix supper and just relax. It's kinda like my sanctuary, the one area that is just mine in this crazy place.

It's not just me.

2008-04-05T09:58:00.000-07:00

I started my list of crazy things that I've said since becoming a mother. A new on I recently had to say was...

TJ stop dancing in the milk

Then I proceeded to wipe the milk bubble beard off his chin, change his soaked clothes, then clean up the puddle of milk. He likes to take a drink and then let it run down the front of him.

My husband called from work the other day and told me something that he heard a mother saying to her child. Now I have never had to say this but I felt that it would be a good one to share.

Give me your head right now!

She was trying to get a coat on the child and they were fighting. I can just picture someone taking there head right off and handing it to her.

Chicken broth

2008-04-02T06:16:00.000-07:00

My oldest son is 20 months old and he is in the opening everything and pulling out all the beef broth and chicken broth stage. He likes to stack them in a kind of boobie trap in the doorway from the kitchen to the laundry room. My husband had thought that he had the problem remedied by using packing tape and taping things shut. Well, that worked for a while until he saw mommy and daddy getting into the cabinets by pulling the tape back. It didn't take long for TJ to figure it out.
We just moved to a new house and the baby locks didn't fit on the new cabinets. So I figured taking off the handles would fix the problem. He's not going to be able to open the cabinets when they don't have handles, right? Wrong! It almost seemed to make it easier.
So being the ever so inventive mother that I am I thought that a quick fix, just until we get the new handles on, would be to use duct tape on the cabinets. Now, I know what your thinking if it didn't work before why would it work now? My logic was this: we only used packing tape before duct tape is a lot stronger right?
Well, it is a lot stronger but it still didn't keep the baby out of the cabinets. All it managed to accomplish was ripping the finish off of the cabinets. You can see exactly where I had put the tape on every cabinet.
We were going to refinish the cabinets anyway. Now, I can tell my husband we have to do it sooner!

Ouch!

2008-04-01T13:07:00.000-07:00

I had the spinal tap yesterday, and my back still hurts. Luckily I didn't have to stay overnight in the hospital. I didn't even have to stay there flat on my back like I did the last time.
I got to the hospital at 8:30 and was out at like10:30. Of course I had to come home and lay down and not do anything yesterday.
They gave me demorol and visorol to help me relax before the procedure. Let me just say that it works very well. In between the shots to numb my back and the actual LP I was falling asleep. Which is not very easy to do when your having a spinal done because they have you pretty much bent in half.
Even today I'm still very groggy from the medicine. My mom took the boys home with her last night so I could get some rest. Pretty much all I did yesterday after the LP was sleep. I went to bed around 11 last night and I slept in until noon today. I stil feel like I could go back to sleep right now and sleep the rest of the night.
Tonight, my husband Josh, has school and I am home alone wih the boys. Usually this is no big deal but since I just had the spinal, I am in a lot of pain. I have trouble picking up the boys. Well, I guess you just have to deal when you're a parent.

Hospital here I come, again.

2008-03-29T17:26:00.000-07:00

Idiopathic intracranial hypertension (IIH), sometimes called benign intracranial hypertension (BIH) or pseudotumor cerebri (PTC) is a neurological disorder that is characterized by increased intracranial pressure (ICP), in the absence of a tumor or other diseases affecting the brain or its lining. The main symptoms are headache and visual problems.

The above is a description of the neurological disorder that I have. Basically, what it means is I have an increase in the fluid around my brain. My body doesn't drain the fluid like it should.

Lucky for me the only way to properly diagnose it is to do a spinal tap. So tomorrow I go in for my third spinal tap. This one is to make sure that the medicine is working and that the fluid is draining from around my brain.

Besides the fact that spinal taps suck in general and I always feel horrible after I have one. I have to lay flat on my back for like six hours afterward. That is so awful. I would much rather be at home playing with my children than laying in a hospital bed.

Then again, being in the hospital does give me a little bit of a rest. Staying home with the boys does wear me out. Maybe I can get some sleep!

A few more

2008-03-27T21:13:00.001-07:00

Don't eat the shoe!
Josh, come sniff his neck.
Get out from under the sink.
Get the underwear off your head!
Please don't stand on your lunch.

Being a parent

2008-03-27T13:35:00.000-07:00

I was talking to my friend Lori on the phone the other day and we got on the topic of some of the very weird things that I have had to say since I became a mother. Somethings are so off the wall. There are these things that I would have never thought I would hear anybody saying tat are coming out of my mouth. Lori mentioned to me that I should make a list of the things I've had to say since becoming a parent. So I thought I would use this to start my list.

Things I've had to say since becoming a mom:

TJ stop eating the couch!
Don't bite the dog
Hang on, I've got pudding on my foot
Please don't lick the floor
Get your finger out of the baby's nose
Don't sit on your brothers head
Josh, TJ is stuck in the couch!

Those are just the few that I can think of right now. I'm sure there have been and will be many more I'll add to as they come along.

Try and keep up!

2008-03-27T09:47:00.000-07:00

Just to let anybody who reads this know, I am a very random person. I tend to just say whatever comes to mind. And my mind goes about a mile a minute.
I'm sure that I will jump from topic to topic and probably be really hard to follow, but hey that's half the fun right?